7 Different Types of Cart Girls

Beverage cart girls… I would argue they are the unsung heroes of the golf course.

When you hit a great shot, they’re there to help you celebrate. When you hit a bad shot (or playing an awful round of golf), they’re there to help you drown your sorrows.

But not all cart girls are created equal, as I’m sure you know. In a perfect world, cart girls would:

– Be smiling 24/7.
– Around every 3-4 holes so you’re never thirsty.
– Know every hole on the course and give you golf tips.
– Pour you stiff drinks and give you a discount for buying in bulk.
– Cheer you on if they see you hit a bomb off the tee or a tight approach shot.

Sadly, that’s not the case. Instead, I’ve found there are seven common types of beverage cart girls.

1. Mom Next Door

Usually middle-aged, might golf occasionally but generally here for the sun, possibly meet a guy, and tip money. You can count on her to know golf, have a good conversation, and likely pour a stiff drink too.

2. Clueless 18-Year-Old

This type of cart girl really frustrates me the most as they usually have no clue what golf is and tend to:

– Hit the gas in the middle of your swing.
– Drive toward you as you’re about to hit a bomb in the fairway.
– Have zero golf knowledge, making it nearly impossible to carry a conversation.

3. Angry Old Man

The third type of cart girl isn’t a type that you see often, but when you do, you’re probably disappointed. Sometimes a cart girl might call out sick (or no show), leaving the golf club scrambling to find someone to man the beverage cart.

But the only person left is the marshal who was hoping to be home by noon, not driving a drink cart. They usually hate their job and male golfers aren’t thrilled either. But it happens, and occasionally they’ll hook you up with an extra beer and at least know about golf.

4. Stripper

Sometimes they need a side hustle, so why not drive the golf cart for tips? Don’t expect them to know much about the game, but I’m sure they’ll give you a much-needed confidence boost.

5. Perfect 10

While not every golf course has a 10, some do and it’s probably why you keep going back (even if you don’t love the course). The perfect 10 doesn’t even need to know anything about the game because she’s so attractive you forgot you’re even on the golf course.

6. The Drive By

Is there anything worse than anxiously awaiting the cart girl and an ice-cold beverage… only to watch her drive right by? This happens way too often which to me makes zero sense to me!

If they ignore golfers, they aren’t getting tips. Chasing her down like you’re in the Fast and the Furious isn’t ideal, but sometimes you need that beer to play better!

7. Slept Through Her Shift

Don’t you hate it when the beverage cart stops and asks on 18 after not seeing her all day? She probably showed up 1-2 hours late for her shift and your hydration isn’t a primary concern. Nothing worse than sober golf if you’re playing bad…

What type of cart girl do you have at your course?

Let me know in the comments!

By Michael Leonard