Best Trash Talk in Golf

Golf is such a mental game.

As Jim Flick once said, “Golf is 90% mental and the other 10% is mental too.”

Essentially, if you can get into your competitor’s head, you own them! Here are some of the best ways to trash talk on the golf course.

Disclaimer: Before using these tips, just know that karma happens fast in golf. Make sure you are ready to back up the smack talk as too much might piss off the Golf Gods.

“You’re not good enough to get that mad.”

Just typing that piece of trash talk fired me up. I couldn’t imagine hitting a bad shot and then hearing someone say that!

But if you’re feeling bold, this is a great way to add insult to injury. Like I said in the intro, make sure that you back it up with stellar play.

“Nice par.”

The next time you’re playing someone and they stick it close but then miss the putt, use this line. Clearly, when they were walking up to the green they were thinking birdie, then walk away with a frustrating par.

Pour some salt in the wound with a simple “Nice par” as they tap in. This is a sure way to get someone fired up.

“You hit 3 wood, right?”

The next time you pounce on a drive and fly it past someone who also hit a driver, make sure to let them know. Ask them, “You hit a 3 wood, right?”

Let them know that you’re the big dog of the group, but make sure you stuff your approach so you don’t eat your words.

“Not bad for that swing.”

Shots fired with this line!

This trash talk is mental warfare and sure to get in your competitor’s head. When they hit a good one, instantly say “Not bad for that swing” for an epic backhanded compliment.

“I remember my first round of golf.”

Anytime someone makes a dumb mistake on the course, this piece of trash talk never fails. Deliver it with a condescending tone and you will nail it!

“Does your husband play golf too?”

Whenever someone hits a really short drive or leaves a putt way short, this should rile the feathers of your playing partner.

“At least you read it right.”

If you don’t feel like going for the husband’s joke when they leave a putt short, go with “at least you read it right.” Nothing like adding insult to injury when they leave a putt short that has a perfect read.

But that’s why 100% of short putts never go in!

Bonus: Tiger’s Long Drive Move

I remember reading Tiger’s book, “How I Play Golf” and loved this idea. He said that when he knows he out drives a competitor, he walks to their ball like it’s his, looks at it, and then casually walks to his ball.

The best part?

You don’t have to say anything. Let your drive do the talking!

What is your favorite piece of trash talk during golf?

Let us know in the comments below!

Written by Michael Leonard